How Long to Wait Before You Call
***QUESTION***
“Hello Dave,
I just wanted to start off by saying you have very valid points with women. I have worked at bars and restaurants where women come in looking to hook up with men. And the cocky-funny attitude works wonders. I’m 22 going on 23 and I have had no problem ever getting women to give me their number.
But there is one problem I do have. That is timing “the call”. When should I call? Plus I used your “Are you single” approach with this very attractive girl. She gave me 5 mins of her time and I found out some cool things about her. She was very hesitant on giving me her number, but after I sat down to talk to her, she gave me her number.
Well, I called her two days after she gave me her number and she was on the other line. So she told me to call her back in 15 mins. I waited 30 and she never answered the phone. so I left a message. Should I rip up her number and never call her again? Or should I call her in a week? Your advise would be greatly appreciated. Plus why would she give me her number if she planned on not talking to me in the first place?
Thanks.”
My Comments:
I personally think that this is one of the funniest questions in the book. I mean, haven’t you watched “Swingers”? lol…
My rule of thumb is to wait at least one day, but not more than a few. The real key is how OFTEN you call her, and, more importantly, what you SAY when you call.
But let’s talk about the psychology of why women give out their phone numbers, and why I personally like to get email addresses.
You must remember that attractive women are being approached all the time by men, in one way or another.
They have an unlimited supply of guys to choose from.
I think that a lot of women who give out their numbers, then respond by being flaky when you call are doing something that many of us guys wouldn’t have thought of in a million years:
I think they’re making themselves feel good.
Explained differently, I think that many women give out their numbers are looking for the self-image-boosting hit of power that comes from having a lot of men calling them… men that THEY have the power to ACCEPT OR REJECT.
They can also use it to get attention from friends:
“All these guys just keep calling me! Why don’t they just leave me alone! Don’t the get the hint!?”
Now, don’t get me wrong. I know that this sounds a little bit negative… and I don’t mean to say that ALL women do this, or that ALL women are bad, etc.
To me, it’s just part of the real world that you need to learn to accept and deal with.
Which leads me to why I get email addresses…
Keep in mind, I’ve tried a lot of different things when it comes to curing this problem of hot-and-cold women who act one way when you meet them, then totally different when you call.
And what I’ve found is that if you get EMAILS instead, you not only differentiate yourself, but you also increase your chances of hearing back from her about 100%. No lie.
For some reason, email has a power that a call does not.
If you have my book “Double Your Dating“, then you have read about the technique for getting a woman’s email address within a few minutes of meeting her. Email is also seen as lower risk by her… and it’s easier to get as well.
Try it. You’ll like it.
Your Friend,
David DeAngelo