Using Cocky & Funny Humor To Attract Women
>This technique that I call “Cocky & Funny” is my favorite EASY way to make women feel that great feeling called ATTRACTION for you… with only your COMMUNICATION. If you’d like to learn how to use it like a pro, go check THIS out:
***QUESTION***
Hey -
I am 18 years old and just graduated high school. I used to be a MAJOR wuss and when I was younger I was always a shy kid who was picked on a lot because I was a short, skinny kid that never stood up for myself. And worst of all, I never took advantage of high school to get girls! I started getting your newsletter earlier this year and the cocky + funny attitude changed my life in more ways than one.
I hang out with guys that get the hottest high school girls you can ever imagine. Not only do they get 9′s and 10′s, I see these girls obsess over them. I was around them so much that I tried to model thier behavior around girls and I noticed that EVERYTHING you preach about, comes to them NATURALLY. Every tip of advice you’ve given to guys ACTUALLY works, and Ive seen it first hand.
I started using cocky + funny myself and even use lines that Ive seen my friends use in past cases. I saw a HOT girl in the mall and she was checking herself out in a pocket mirror so I said “don’t worry, your hair doesn’t look THATTT bad”.
She started laughing even though I just made fun of her! I asked for her email and when she said she doenst have the internet, I used your line “well do you have electricity“? AGAIN the girl laughed, and I ended up getting her phone # and I hooked up with her that weekend!
MY QUESTION – my natural personality has transformed from a wussy shy nice kid to a guy that’s gonna bust your balls, but a nice guy at heart. I made a lot more girl “friends” too, but whenever they try to tell me their sad stories, I let them know Im not their boyfriend and do not care. Whenever I gain the courage to use cocky+funny, it WORKS but my problem is even though I’ve seen this work in action, I fear I don’t know enough cocky+funny lines to keep up a conversation with a girl.
Also, do you recommend hitting on random strangers you see, because my friends say they never really hit on strangers unless they have a reason to go up and talk to them. My friends also say to ALWAYS have 5 “project girls” and never focus on one girl. Is this true? please write back.
E from NYC
>>>MY COMMENTS:
It’s interesting, because I actually discovered the Cocky and Funny technique by watching guys who were good with women. In fact, a guy who is now a good friend was trying to explain the concept to me a few years back… and he was the first one to say “Cocky and Funny”. Of course, I had no idea what he was talking about at the time. It really made no sense to me.
But, after I started working with it and watching other guys who were really successful with women, I learned how it worked.
It sounds like you’re really getting it – congrats!
As for your questions…
Don’t worry about being able to “come up with enough lines to keep up a conversation“. Just do what you can, and enjoy yourself. A few Cocky and Funny lines used here and there are MUCH better than nothing at all.
If you feel like approaching strangers, great. If you just realize that most women are going to be nice, but some will be either unavailable or unfriendly then you’ll be fine. I have personally had great success meeting “strangers”, and as my good friend Rick says: Every friend you have started out as a stranger…
And as for the “5 project girls”, you’re cracking me up over here. If you like the idea of staying single and dating a lot of different women, then this is the way to do it! Just make sure they don’t turn into your personal “psychological projects”.
Thanks for your email.
**QUESTION***
Hey Dave….
I’m a premed student who has been subscribing to your newsletter for quite a while now. I’ve been meaning to buy your book but im not in the habit of using a credit card so ill have to open an account especially for this. Anyway, i’ve been going out with this girl for 9 months now. She is smart, attractive, and funny.
The way i landed her was by being cocky funny. EXTREMELY cocky funny. i was always one step ahead of her. It was kind of like “Dont even TRY to challenge me, im already inside your head!”. everything was cool. but to tell the truth (and no offense) i just kind of got tired of the constant effort…..so i cooled it off a bit not always seizing the opportunity to remind her just who it is she’s dealing with. And i think i got screwed.
Now i feel like i’ve turned into a wuss….and i HATE IT!!! no..I LOATHE IT !!!!!!!!!! When i turn on the macho act she’s a pussy cat again. You see i want someone to whom i can genuinely be….just nice to, with her appreciating it and NOT taking advantage. i mean since this is a long-term relationship i want someone who will give me a smooth ride without all that continuous maintenance. I dont wanna be cocky and tough all my life with her, sometimes a guy just wants to relax. Is it possible??
F.Z, Lebanon
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Ooooooo, good question.
I’ve seen a trend in the way guys who are learning to be Cocky and Funny and to stay in control change.
As they’re learning the techniques, they become more and more attractive to women. Then, they meet a really amazing woman – a woman that was previously “out of their league” and they decide to start a relationship.
As soon as they start getting closer, the guy begins to put aside the things that worked, and start being more and more submissive… which, of course, drives this new woman away.
Then I get an email saying “I want to be nice and sweet and a good guy but still have all the super hot women calling me 24/7″.
Here’s what I say:
“BEING YOURSELF” IS A PRIVELEGE THAT YOU HAVE TO EARN, NOT A RIGHT.
And the way that you earn it is to learn what it takes to make women feel ATTRACTION, learn what it takes to NOT drive women away, then make these things part of “YOURSELF”.
Are you with me here?
The problem is that “being yourself” for a lot of guys means “being the type of guy that women don’t feel any ATTRACTION for”.
If you can’t make a woman feel the emotion of ATTRACTION, then there’s really nothing I can do to help you. If you’re not willing to do the work and make the changes more or less permanent, then you’re going to have a long uphill battle.
And in your case, you have to realize that this woman was attracted to you for a REASON, and if you stop that REASON, then you’re going to stop the ATTRACTION.
**QUESTION***
Whats goin on Dave?
I would love to say how great your stuff works, but I haven’t had much luck with it as of yet. I have seen it put to good use though. My bro does the whole cocky/funny routine naturally and I see all its power. Most of the time I was Mr. Nice-Guy. and, of course, it didn’t work as much as I would like. Which is why I’m writing this e-mail.(duh)
My problem is I’m missing the key ingredient to your ‘super recipe,’ funny. The way I see it, cocky is like garlic, by itself it is repulsive and disgusting. But when used as a seasoning to another main dish (funny), it can do wonders. I’m missing the main dish. Anyone can be cocky, but I lack in the funny department. So where do I start to fix this?
Thanks, P in NJ
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Humor has a structure, and it can be learned. Some people have an easier time learning how to be funny than others, but I’ve seen some not-too-funny people become VERY funny with practice.
Read some books, watch Comedy Central, and practice. Start a journal and write down funny lines you hear so you can use them later.
Get with your Bro and watch him. Ask him for advice and ideas. Practice. You can learn how to be funny, and it’s important that you do if you want to attract women!
***COMMENT***
Dave,
I know that you put real stories in these letters because I sent one in and it appeared exactly as I had written it. I laughed till I cried over the “fat, pimply, and hairy” story.
You are “Da man” I look forward to your wit in these letters and I must admit I’m going to buy your book.
GJ
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yes, all of the email letters I print in my newsletters are ALL real. Every single one of them. I wish I had more time in the day, because I get hundreds of them a week…
Thanks for the compliments, and enjoy.
***QUESTION***
Ok David, first off, I would like to say thank you for taking the years that you did to get all of this great info., and then be generous enough to spread the knowledge. Here is my situation. I knew this girl back in high school, and I haven’t seen her since graduation (about 2 yrs ago). I bumped into her the other day and WOW (she is a 9.5 easy). Well, having not yet tried out any of your techniques, I thought “What the hell, let’s go for it.” It worked. The c/f technique was golden. Got her email AND number. Well, we eventually went out and had a great time.
A couple of days later, I went over to see her new place, and well, things got a little wild. (it all started with your amazing kiss technique- thanks again) So here’s the deal. She likes me a lot, and I like her a lot, but I have been playing back in order to keep the ugly head of the “wussy” out of the picture. When is a good time (or is there a good time at all) to be serious with her? Do I bust on her all the time, b/c I don’t want her to think I am a jerk? Any help you can give is great.
Thanks again.
ME
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Well, I don’t exactly know what you mean by “serious”.
If you mean “When can I talk about how I’m sad because my dog got run over and my inner child needs a hug“, then NEVER is the answer.
Well, maybe you can have one “serious” conversation like this on the 10th date, and it can last no longer than 5 minutes.
Just stay away from heavy emotional issues, problems, drama, and general WUSS topics.
If you need a friend, GET A DOG!
lol… I forgot where that line is from, but I love it.
Look man, if you feel like you might be in danger of screwing it up because you can’t control your INNER WUSSY, then you need to do some INNER WORK. DEEP inner work. Go here for the cure:
***QUESTION***
Mr. DeAngelo,
Well, I’ve got to say, after trying many, many different methods, yours have been the first ones to work. I cut and pasted your online personal add and sent it out to a few women on a college-oriented site. This is after trying (unsuccessfully) for many months to get any sort of response from the women on the site.
Before reading the newsletters, I would’ve typically sent out about 20 e-mails, and got 1 response if I was lucky. This time, however, I sent out about 5 or 6, and got 3 replies the next day! Unbelievable! Now, for the tricky part…getting the number and the date. I’ve got some leads, and I want to keep my C&F attitude up. I’m just normally funny, but need practice at being cocky. (I’m either too subtle, or too extreme, so I’m practicing at finding a middle ground.)
But, in the meantime, what kind of C&F response would you give to a University-aged woman?
G.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Good job.
There are all kinds of great topics you could work with.
You could make fun of the classes they’re taking, bust on them for taking easy classes, accuse them of taking 10 years to get a 4 year degree… the list is endless.
Since you’re going to be meeting these women at some point, make sure you go and do things with them that have “built in conversation value”. Go to interesting, fun parts of town with unusual and interesting shops.
This kind of thing creates all kinds of opportunity for great comments… and it keeps the energy up all by itself.
Now that you’re meeting women online, do yourself a big favor and practice your skills CHATTING with women.
Chatting is great because it slows the conversation down to about 1/5 the normal speed, and gives you time to plan out what you’re saying.
***QUESTION***
Dear Dave,
I’m real sorry but I still cannot figure out how to build bridges after getting the email address. Normally the next day I send the lady an email, she replies and then I can’t think what on earth else to do. My overall goal is to get with her – so can you help me man?
I.M.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yes, I think I can help.
- Set up a meeting for tea.
- Have her stop by your place on the way to tea.
- Have fun, interesting conversation.
- Invite her back to your place.
- Use the Kiss Test.
- Use your creativity and imagination.
Don’t focus too much on “getting with her”, just focus on getting to THE NEXT STEP.
In other words, when you email don’t say something like:
“Hi, it was great meeting you. I’m single and nice, and you seem like you’d make a great girlfriend for a sweet, desperate loser like myself.”
Stay off of heavy conversation. Don’t talk about relationships and marriage, etc. Just talk and enjoy yourself. But keep progressing as you do.
As long as you relax and make each progressive step easy and natural, you’ll be fine.
Again, just take it one step at a time.
***QUESTION***
Hi David:
I’m 42 and a bald, average, confident guy. After being recently divorced after 24 yrs and thoroughly confused about dating and what women want. I bought [another dating book] and was even more scared to do any of what was asked to do. I bought your course and coupled with watching the players in clubs I knew C&F was the answer. I used it successfully on over (9) women since Jan/02 all resulting in them wanting much, much more* than I was willing to give. They all call from time-to-time for fun!.
*Here is where I have the problem and it might help others trying for this type of relationship. I am single and love my Space and I want to have fun for a while and eventually marry again I’m looking for Her and it takes a while to see if she is Her I get them hooked way too fast and not trying to do so.
This is how: Women are attracted to C&F, They want fun and excitement; I think I know why they want funny for the fun things to do in life (too many boring guys out there) and the cocky part piques their inner flames to what could happen as far as passion. If when you are passionate with them you have to be a Leader and show them as bad a boy as they can handle.
This has in all instances so far lead them to call me and pursue me: the next day and weeks ahead. They want a far deeper relationship. They want C&F in their lives. These are not clingy people (7-9′s) (24-44yrs) and profess to want to be friends first. Email is great as it has a way of helping them say things they wished they could say in person. Do you have any wisdom on how to do C&F and not hit all of her senses?
Thanks Again for C&F J.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
lol… you poor, poor dear. Sounds tough, really.
I think you’re doing fine. You’re on the right track, and I think that you’re going to find an outstanding woman to have a longer-term relationship with.
I personally think that the problem isn’t the techniques you’re using, it’s that you’re now seeing that YOU CAN CHOOSE A WOMAN, rather than having HER CHOOSE YOU… and it’s making you far more SELECTIVE than you were in the past.
When you’re seeing several attractive women at the same time, you begin to realize that you can have whatever you want. You no longer have to settle.
This has the effect of making you a lot more picky about what you’ll tolerate… and it makes you see negatives a lot more clearly in women.
Again, I think you’re doing fine. Just stick with it and you’ll find a great woman to marry again, if that’s what you want.
***QUESTION***
Hi Dave. I don’t think the cocky/funny technique will work for me. I’m 19 y/o, 5′ 3″ and 117 lb. I have an average build, dark hair and blue eyes. I also have a fetish for girls with big bellies. What do you think? Be honest.
SO
Birmingham, England
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Well, if I can get myself to stop laughing, maybe I can answer you!
OK, let’s make sure I have the facts straight here…
You’re five foot three, weigh 117, and LIKE WOMEN WITH BIG BELLIES?
Honestly, I think you’re right… I don’t think that the Cocky and Funny technique will work for you… in fact…I DON’T THINK ANYTHING IS GOING TO WORK FOR YOU.
Make sure you don’t tell any of your other guy friends about this. It might get ugly.
By the way, you may not have considered this, but women with big bellies usually got them from eating a lot… and my guess is that they might be expensive dates.
Watch out.
***SUCCESS STORY***
Dave:
Dated someone for 4 years. Turned into a wussy boy a couple times, and both times she left me for the same guy. This guy was a selfish, conceited jerk, but he was the ONLY guy she’s ever dated who she couldn’t wrap around her finger. He was an impossible challenge…and so her sexual attraction to him was enormous. (Hmmm…is there a lesson to be learned here…?) Since we broke up about a year ago, I’ve been reading your newsletters and your ebooks.
Now I’M the challenging one. I don’t flatter women with compliments, I don’t buy drinks or flowers, I split the dinner tab, I don’t always call (or call back) every day, I keep my social life busy and interesting. And I never ever EVER lose my composure with a woman – no matter how much I’m attracted to them. (In truth: I caved to one woman, told her how attracted I was to her, and instantly found myself in the “just friends” pit of no return. Oops. Had to learn the hard way.)
Now every time a woman tries to test my level of “wussiness” I completely annihilate them with a cocky+funny comment…and they LOVE me for it. And…of course…guess who suddenly wants to date me again…
Thanks D,
M.S. Chicago
P.S. Took this off the end of the 1st paragraph above…it was getting too long, but I love this perspective from a woman: While investigating this illogical phenomenon, I asked a somewhat-attractive female friend of mine “so…can you shed any light onto the whole ‘why women are attracted to jerks’ idea?” And her answer (quote): “Because we’re too leary of a nice guy. Nice guys creep me out. They seem like I can walk all over them and I hate that. Women want a bit of a challenge.”
>>>MY COMMENTS:
This is truth from the mountain. Read it 100 times a day.
Print it and tape it to your computer monitor.
Put a copy in your wallet… next to the money so you see it often.
Put one on your car sun visor and mirror.
And go read it again now.
***QUESTION***
Yes Dave,
you are 100% correct. Even us older, fatter, grayer, slower wusses can learn new tricks. I went from a 4 time loser to being called biggest old stud in town! Now that was a hell of an ego boost! Especially since I’m 48 and close to 300 lbs. and yes, at the moment, I have steady dates for 3 days of the week every week and 5 others professing their love for me if only I will come take them away.
Here are what I found to work:
1) Women over 35 expect you to be extremely inventive with a cocky funny line or extremely truthful. They all claim it is because they have had so many used on them, they are totally immune to them. I tend to go the extremely truthful route. ie. you look like the type of woman who would like a funny witty, intelligent, romantic friend. Have you found any lately??? I want to shake their hand. Or something similar.
2) If you are emailing back and forth and they want your picture within the first couple of exchanges, run do not walk, that lady to the discard pile immediately. Most of those are so shallow they can not and will not see what they are doing, no matter how funny and blunt you are. I even tried the “what’s in it for me?” line, only to get the reply of “me stupid, but only if I like your picture”
3) When the lady says I don’t think I’m really your type, you look them straight in the eye and say “ok, plenty more where you came from” and turn and walk away. 9 out of 10 of them will be calling you in 48 hours.
4) They all know about arranging dates for the week and finding the dates on the weekend. So tell them you only have like Friday, Saturday OR Sunday open but not all. Most will tell you to rearrange your week to fit them in. The ones really really interested will call you on Saturday to see if you can go out on the spur of the moment.
5) I tell them all I am too much to handle and too much to love, so being friends is just perfect. But I have zero experience in this dating more than one woman thing at a time. Do you have any advice. Especially since I am sure to make a lot of mistakes. Yeah, they all want to arrange more time with me.
So you see, your techniques work. Even my 21 y/o daughter who reads these occasionally says, “I can’t agree all the way, but damn he sure got the last 5 guys I dated nailed”
Keep up the good work Dave.
M.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Wow, more priceless wisdom.
To answer your question, the way to see more than one woman at a time is to NOT SEE ANY OF THEM TOO OFTEN.
When you see or talk to a woman more than once or twice a week, it kicks in the natural “relationship” emotions and patterns of communication and behavior.
If you keep things to once a week, and sometimes twice, you’ll tend to avoid this.
It’s also good to tell the women that you’re seeing that you don’t think it’s a good idea to get into a relationship too quickly with someone you just met (I believe this is a very important idea, myself).
Thanks for the great ideas.
***QUESTION***
Hi David,
I thoroughly enjoyed reading your book…very enlightening. I’ve always found myself attracting girls I’m not romantically interested in, while crashing and burning with the hotties. It was very confusing until I read your book.
I realize now that I was a wuss with the hotties by being a typical “nice guy”, and that the more I acted indifferent with the girls I didn’t like, the more they ate it up. You gave me a new perspective on what makes attraction work, and I’m glad to see that your book pointed out that you don’t have to be a jerk to be successful. My game has improved but it still requires some refining. Lately I find I’m stalling out between the first and second date. So I’m wondering if I’m screwing up the date itself or the follow-through.
Here are the steps I take after a date:
1) I call within two days to say I had a good time and basically make contact. I end the conversation first, and let her know I’ll give her a shout in a couple days…just so I don’t seem like I’m rushing into a second date.
2) I let two or three days pass and call to make arrangements for a second date. At this point I usually get a vague answer like “lets set something up for next week“…and then it never happens. Where is this falling apart and what kind of follow-through do you use?
Thanks for the help,
SF London, Ontario
>>>MY COMMENTS:
I’m going to have to guess at a few things, but I’ll give it a shot.
From the sounds of it, you need to:
1) Stop with the “I had a good time” type comments when you call for a follow up. You might experiment with waiting longer to call… or waiting less time to call. See what works best for you. But don’t be so “nice”.
2) Do more things to make your date feel ATTRACTION. Use what you’ve learned to really turn the dial up. You might test progressing further on the first date… maybe start getting physical faster.
3) Make sure you keep her laughing, and keep busting on her and treating her like a “friend” at first. Remember the idea of acting like she’s your Bratty Little Sister.
It sounds like you’re doing something on those first dates that’s making the women resistant to seeing you again… you need to figure out what it is and STOP IT.
***QUESTION***
David,
On vacation in Mexico, a girl asked me if she was “super hot” and I said “Yeah, you’re alright.” Next thing you know she made it her business to prove to me how hot she was, including some freaky dancing, even flashing me, and a little lip action.
Moral: Never give them what the want. I moved in to kiss a girl a little too early and she backed away. So I went back to teasing her and on the next attempt I went straight for the neck, ears, hands in hair and well you wouldn’t believe it; but it worked that time. Your book has a lot of very good information, thank you for putting it together.
So here’s my question: This girl at my gym is of those that I’ve always wanted to talk to but never really had the chance. She was bartending the other night and I told her I’d seen her at the gym. She said “yeah, but I don’t make it in there as much lately.” I replied “Yeah, I can tell, you’re really letting yourself go.”
Then she gives me a shot and asks me if I’d help her with her workout. She also said she remembered me from the gym and I said “So you were checking me out?” So I get her number, not bad, eh? So I’m in the bar for another hour with some friends and I was going to order a drink from her later, but it might’ve seemed like I wanted to talk to her again. She seemed busy and didn’t look at me.
Seemingly wuss behavior or she’s just busy? Who knows. That was on Saturday and I called her on Wednesday, still no reply and today is Friday. I’m thinking either calling her once more over the weekend, asking about playing hard to get and if she just randomly gives out shots, or maybe going back to her bar in a week or two with some friends. Again, thank you for all you’ve done and thanks in advance for any suggestions.
A.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
I’m going to tell you something here, and leave it to you to figure out why it’s important:
YOU SHOULD HAVE LEFT RIGHT AFTER YOU GOT HER NUMBER.
This is SUPER ULTRA EXTRA important… and I want you to consider it in your mind until you figure out why.
***QUESTION***
Hey Dave,
I got your e-mails for about a month before i actually bought the books and I regret waiting so long. I have never been so confident around women. I stand as a security guard at the entrance of a retail store and 8′s, 9′s, and some 10′s pass by me everyday. I used to turn my head and stare away. Now I know what they want from reading your book and I can look at them, talk to them, and bust their balls even without ever meeting them.
I do have a problem though. I took this beautiful girl out on a first date, the C&F technique worked so well all night from the movie to the dinner to the goodnight kiss (tongue included) that we both definitely wanted a 2nd date. So what’s the problem. She can’t stop thinking about me or leaving me alone. I’m getting 10 text messages a day from this girl that I really only want to date a few times. I’m enjoying this bein single dating around and she wants me to be with her everyday.
How can I slow this down, without losing the C&F personality?
Thanks Dave.
MM Kentucky
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Wow, another guy who my heart goes out to.
I need to write a book called “Cut Your Dating In Half: A guide for guys who are too successful with my materials.”
I think what you need to do is get together with her and say: “Look, you’re acting like we’re married, and you need to cool it. I think you’re great, but I’m not interested in a relationship right now, so if you want to keep seeing me, then you’re going to need to chill.”
I realize that it sounds a little bit harsh, but it’s the truth, and you need to be direct in a situation like this one.
***QUESTION***
Dave,
When I first started reading your advice, I felt that they were wildly off base. All my prior success had been as what you would consider a “wuss”. However, curiosity drove me to try out your techniques and I found they increased my dating considerably. I went from only occasional dates, to having 3-4 dates every weekend. However, I have two questions which I have not found the answer to in your book.
1. How long should I keep up the cocky/funny attitude? It’s really unnatural for me, and I’m not sure when I should drop it, and show a girl my true self.
2. I have a good friend who I’ve been friends with for a while. I guess she would consider me a “girlfriend-man” I’d always be the one with the sympathetic ear, listening to her problems and such. Is it possible, after getting this deep in the “friend-zone” to become more than friends with her? I don’t want to risk ruining a friendship, but I’ve very interested in dating her. How do I do it?
Thanks,
S.S., Maine
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Great questions. To answer your first question, WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO STOP DOING WHAT’S WORKING? I realize that you may not have been “naturally” Cocky and Funny before recently, but if it’s working so well, why would you want to change it?
I get a lot of questions about this topic, and I can really understand the point. You’d rather be able to do what “comes naturally” to you and be “yourself” around women.
But, if you look at your second question, you’ll find that you actually spell out what happens when you just “be yourself”. You turn into “girlfriend-man”. You become a “friend”.
I don’t think that’s what you want.
But, instead of thinking as Cocky and Funny as a process of “not being yourself”, instead think of it as “being considerate of what a woman wants” and providing it. I think that you can really learn to enjoy being Cocky and Funny, and make it part of your personality.
To answer your second question, it’s quite a task to turn a girl “friend” into something more… but it definitely can be done. I personally have better things to do with my time, but if you’re HELL BENT on doing it, then do this:
- Stop talking to her so much.
- Stop acting like a WUSS when you do talk to her.
- Start busting on her more and being indifferent.
- Tell her about how well you’re doing with the ladies.
- If she beings flirting back, then progress to The Kiss Test and move things to a physical level.
You need to stop acting like a “girlfriend” and start acting like a guy who makes women feel ATTRACTION at a GUT level. But be careful, because if you screw this one up, you’ll probably lose her friendship as well.
***QUESTION***
I owe a lot of my success to you. I try the cocky funny thing, and it does work thank you for that. But I don’t like the whole one night stand thing. I want to get a girl and do the whole boyfriend thing. My question to you is HOW? I’ve met my share of 7′s and 8′s, but they just aren’t what I’m looking for.
Thank you in advance.
J.B. CA
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Well, you’re not alone. I believe that MOST men would prefer to meet a great girl and have a fulfilling relationship. I really do believe this.
In my estimation, 80%-90% of men are ultimately looking for a fantastic woman to enjoy a relationship with.
One of the main reasons why I advocate learning how to be successful with women and dating is IT’S NOT EASY TO FIND A HAPPY, HIGH QUALITY, EMOTIONALLY HEALTHY WOMAN!
You usually have to meet a lot of women before you find a woman that is a great match for you…a woman that you don’t feel like you’re “settling” for.
In order to do that, you’re going to have to have some real SKILLS and understanding of how the dynamics of male/female ATTRACTION works.
Stick with it, you’re in a great place right now, and I’ll bet that you’re going to meet someone that you like very soon. But have fun while you’re at it, because life is just too short to run around feeling unsatisfied.
***QUESTION***
Hey Dave,
Ive been reading your emails and i have been applying some of it and i have found that most of it works. That is great and all but I really don’t like being cocky and funny i just like being my sweet self. i like complementing left and right. What i wanna know is why do women like it when a guy is a little rude or just plain “full of himself”.
And another thing. Why is it that when a woman starts complaining about her man or what ever why is it that women Say they want a sweet and sensitive guy who respects her feelings? But in reality she doesn’t. It really doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to me.
Laterz
DAL Florida
>>>MY COMMENTS:
With all due respect, please do all the women you’re meeting a couple of favors:
1) Stop “complimenting left and right”.
2) Stop being “your sweet self”.
…unless, of course, you look like Brad Pitt or have over $10 million dollars. In these cases, do whatever you want.
For the first several interactions with a woman (through the first 10 dates or so), DON’T ACT LIKE A WUSSY!
When you act like a wuss and give lots of compliments, you are doing what 98% of all the other guys she’s meeting are doing. You’re being average. You’re boring. You’re coming across as fake and weak.
If you want to know why it is that women are attracted to jerks, then read my book or come to my seminar in Chicago. The short answer is that WOMEN CAN’T HELP IT. They come wired at birth to respond to many of the behaviors that many jerks display. I believe that you can create ATTRACTION inside of a woman by doing some of the things that jerks do WITHOUT the abusive part.
Stay tuned for more…
***QUESTION***
Dave,
I sent my brother your tips and that same day he bought the books. He was explaining to me how great your advice i.. He went out the first weekend that he bought the books…. then he is calling me at 4 am… he is in 7th Heaven expounding how wonderful he feels and how great your advice is…and he is overweight and not attractive at the moment. He has not been this happy in over 5 years. Thanks for helping my brother feel good about himself again.
My question is, .. I am in a serious relationship and want to keep the energy alive. I have been pouring myself to this woman and she loves me, but I know that I am into her more than she is into me (just a little) and I want to turn that around….. I am probably going to ease up a little and make her beg for it ….. is that the right approach and can your book help me too?
M on Oahu, Hawaii
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yes, I think that the materials can help keep relationships healthy and interesting, even though I avoid giving relationship advice or talking about the topic.
As I’ve said before, it’s not that I don’t like relationships or don’t think they’re healthy…
I just happen to specialize in the stages before the relationship, so that’s what I talk about.
Thanks for your email, and I’m glad to hear that your brother is getting this part of his life together.
***QUESTION***
Hi David,
I figured I’d give this a try since I’m running out of ideas. About 3 months back I met a beautiful spanish girl from Miami after spending 2 months of talking to her online. The night before we met I really screwed up by getting in an argument with her and telling her not to email me again. (Idiot I know!)
The next day I regretted it terribly but I got an email back from her saying it was ok and she was happy, and that God told her I wasn’t the guy for her anyway. I felt horrible. I ended up getting her to meet me the same day, brought her a rose, and just walked around the mall and talked with her. She was absolutely beautiful and I could almost feel tears in my eyes because I wanted her so much and yet it seemed there’s nothing I can do.
We spent about 3 hours just talking and then we departed because she had to leave in a hurry to get home. We talked online again and I managed to blurt out “Are you ever going to tell me why you aren’t interested in me?” and she responded by saying “lol it’s a long story. it’s like I’ve known you all my life, just not as a boyfriend.”
I know I tried to move too fast, and I did make some mistakes. But now I feel it’s hopeless. She wants to be friends with me, but nothing more and I can’t see it turning into more. It’s like in front of me is this bag of a million dollars that I just want to take, have a great time with and so forth..but I know the money isn’t mine and all I can do is stare at it, wishing it was mine.
I know it’s stupid but just thinking how much I want her and knowing I don’t stand a chance almost makes my eyes misty. I can’t even meet her in person anymore because I keep imagining her finding a boyfriend and then I’ll have to pretend I’m happy for when I know it would kill me. I just want to forget about her but I can’t.. I don’t know what to do, it’s driving me crazy.. I’ve never wanted anyone in my life so much, and it’s the only girl that I want is the one I can’t have.
Is there anything I can do? Is it time to give up? How can I forget about the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met in my life? Thank you for any help it is greatly appreciated.
Kind Regards,
S
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Oh Lord. I’m slapping my head right now…somebody stop me.
Someone needs to shake the Wuss out of you!
Wake up, and stop this immediately!
You need serious help before you hurt yourself.
Go to:
…before it’s too late. And maybe read a couple of Wayne Dyer books from the 70s so you can get control of those emotions. You’re freaking me out over here.
**SUCCESS STORY***
Hey dave
you rock man i have been using your techniques for about 6 months, and i can’t believe how good it works..Not only that but most of my friends want to know what the hell i am doing to get all these girls, I have actually picked up and slept with three different girls this week , and if i had more free time it could have been more like 4 or 5.
There are 2 problems though that i do find, when i have girls always hanging around me i find that there are always guys that want to hang around me too, and no word of a lie i have had guys buy me drinks just to hang out with me, Maybe you should write another book how to keep the pathetic males away from the c$f technique, i’ll never let the cat out of the bag the best i can do for them is give them your website :)
The more girls i date the more confident i get which means loooook out ladies…lolol :) seeeya dave keep up the good work, also try to get a seminar in Toronto k
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Well then, you’re tearing it up out there.
Your techniques are working so well that even GUYS are attracted to you. I don’t know whether to kiss your or tell you to tone it down.
Maybe neither.
Whatever.
Thanks for the email, and maybe you’re going to have to beat all those guys off with a stick.
I know, I know, but sometimes I just can’t help myself…
**QUESTION***
I met a lady and was funny and cocky, but I was too forward about sex and she blew me off. The next time I met her, I said “I only want to be friends“, then I gave her a foot, leg and a head rub. She allowed me to continue this as I explained why we could only be friends. I later gave the kiss test and it was fireworks from there.
My question is: Why did telling her I only wanted to be friends totally change how she reacted to me?
Confused and Satisfied.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Oh, don’t get me started on why reverse psychology works with women…
Here’s a little insight for you:
WOMEN DON’T GENERALLY TAKE ANYTHING AT FACE VALUE, THEY ARE ALWAYS TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHAT EVERYTHING “MEANS”.
In other words, if you say “You’re beautiful” a woman might think “What he REALLY means is that he wants to get into my pants”.
If you say, “I just want to be friends” a woman might thing “What he REALLY means is that he’s not attracted to me… maybe there’s something wrong here because most men fall all over themselves. Maybe I don’t look good today. Maybe I’m losing my beauty. Oh yea? I’ll show him… I’m going to MAKE him feel attracted to me!”
Put that in your pipe and smoke it.
In the land of female perception and interpretation, things are strange. But if you can get it through your head to stop trying to communicate directly and explicitly most of the time, you’ll do much better all the way around.
***COMMENT FROM A WOMAN***
I starting reading your Dating Tips from a guy friend who prints them out and has them at his house. Mostly for the sake of curiosity and to see if you were really right. And any girl that disagrees is totally not being honest, all your stuff was right on. Your kiss test, perfect, the cocky and funny attitude, I love, even if I act like I don’t sometimes.
Your approach to women is exactly what girls like. It’s awesome how your helping guys out by sharing your experience and giving them pointers so they can become more confident. There is nothing less attractive than a wuss, I will totally be into a guy until he starts acting like a wuss and I loose all interest in him. I’m glad your letting guys know that.
I don’t know if you give advice to girls but, while I’m writing, I have a really good guy friend, we hang out probably twice a week (he always calls to hang out, I won’t call guys unless we are in a relationship) he confuses the hell out of me. He’ll tell me about his dates and ask advice from me, which makes me think he just considers me a friend. But then I’ll be laying in his lap and he’ll be rubbing my head and playing with my hair. What do you think he thinks of me? May seem like an obvious answer but he really does confuse me. Hey, maybe he reads your stuff.
Anyway, I thought I’d write and let you know that your right on the money, which you probably already do know, but I read that email from that other girl (the one with the grammar and spelling problem) and was kind of ticked, she obviously doesn’t know what she’s talking about and is probably twelve by the way she was talking.
Thanks for helping all these guys out and telling them what we really love!
V.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
I love honest women. You forgot to include your phone number and several classy-yet-sexy pictures of yourself with your email.
Why is it that I tend to believe you more than the girl at the beginning of this mailbag who was all upset because I’m messing up her game?
As for your guy friend, I think he knows EXACTLY what’s going on.
And because he’s not acting like a typical loser, wienie, wussy boy, you’re REALLY getting into him.
I think you should play hard to get a little more, and start dating other guys, then tell HIM about it! See what his reaction is. This will settle the matter for you…
Thanks for your email, and don’t forget the pictures.
***COMMENT***
Dave,
Just a quick note to say this stuff works just like pressing a button. I have two teenage sons entering the dating world. So, wanting to make sure they would be big “Mack daddies”, like their old man, I got your book. And of course I had to preview all the material to insure quality and readability. I laughed my a.. off! Even though I am happily married, I could not resist using the C&F, just to mess with them. Now I’ve got to stop! Ladies of all ages, some nearly half my age (43), coming on to me. And I mean heavy duty obsessions. I am AFRAID! Guys, be careful with this stuff!
Guy in Florida
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Amazing.
What’s up with you being the coolest dad that I’ve personally ever heard of in my entire life?!
Emails like this one actually warm my heart.
Of course, I love making fun of girly-men too, but this is just out of control.
If you’re a father of teenage boys, do them a favor and teach them the skills they’ll need later on.
At this stage you can weave ethics and responsibility into the materials, and make sure that they learn how to use the power with responsibility, rather than just learning to be jerks later in life who abuse women.
It’s a great idea.
**SUCCESS STORY***
I met a woman through the internet. She had several pictures and a good profile posted. I tried to keep our conversation fun. I suggested that we meet some time for coffee or a toddy. She told me she didn’t want to meet me because I would then stop sending her such great emails. I sent her an email, “What makes you think they won’t get better“? She sent her phone number. I didn’t ask to meet her again for about a week.
She mailed me and said, How will you know if you like or don’t like me?” I mailed back, “I will know when we touch”. I met her for a drink. I sat across from her. We talked for a long time. Then I asked to see her hand. I took it in mine and lightly kissed it. She was trembling. I went to the mens room and when I returned I sat next to her. I touched and fondled her hair and commented that it was pretty and she was also. I reached for her hand again. She was trembling. I knew I could safely kiss her then.
JB Little Rock, AR
>>>MY COMMENTS:
You have harnessed one of the most important concepts for creating ATTRACTION:
ANTICIPATION.
Women respond VERY powerfully to anticipation, and you’ve used it masterfully.
You kept on teasing her with ideas, then leaning back and not letting her know when things were going to progress.
Your short paragraph is an amazing example of what TO do.
Thanks for the story.
**MORE SUCCESS***
You are the man! I am an 18 year old who just graduated from high school, I downloaded your book about 2 months ago. In that time I have gotten with 3 hot chicks and made the 2 most gorgeous girls at my high school to dump their boyfriends and come crawling to me just by busting their balls WHENEVER I talk to them, or any girl, whether it be online or in person.
I have dated many girls, including the 2 gorgeous ones, and things would go good for awhile, but then I would get wussy syndrome and they would give me the boot. Now I am in total control of the girls from my school and I cant wait to go to college this fall and use your techniques to make the GORGEOUS girls come to me. I’ll keep ya posted about all the success I will have with college chicks. I have more confidence than ever. Every guy should buy this book.
Thanks again,
J.K. Michigan
>>>MY COMMENTS:
As Christopher Walken said in the famous Saturday Night Live Skit “More Cowbell”…
I LIKE WHAT I’M HEARING!
The question is, do you KNOW why these women are now STAYING attracted to you?
It’s because you’re not turning into a WUSSBAG instantly after getting the girl.
One of the biggest mistakes guys make is also one of the most DIFFICULT to even UNDERSTAND.
It’s the mistake of finally GETTING the girl that you want, then changing your behavior, turning into an “ass-kissing wussy”, and pushing the “stop feeling any attraction” button inside of her.
You can’t blame a woman for leaving you because she stops feeling emotions for you.
And when you CAUSE her to lose those feelings of “electricity” and attraction, you’ve got no one to blame but YOURSELF.
I know, it sucks huh?
As you’ve mentioned, one of the best ways to create and maintain attraction is by using the technique that I call “Cocky & Funny”. It’s a “trademark” technique that I’ve learned and developed over the last several years.
If you’d like to MASTER this technique and really understand how to use this simple communication style to create and maintain attraction with women, then I HIGHLY recommend that you check out my “Cocky Comedy And Other Conversation Skills” DVD/CD program.
This is an entire program that I’ve created JUST to teach you how to use humor and conversation to make women feel attracted to you.
There is nothing like this program anywhere else on the planet, and I assure you that it will help you attract women… no gifts, dinners, or insincere compliments required.
Go watch some video clips of the program here:
And if you haven’t taken the time to download my online eBooks, you need to do that IMMEDIATELY.
You just read how guys have literally changed their dating LIVES with the information in my original Double Your Dating eBook. You can download that one here, and be reading it within just a few minutes:
I’ll talk to you again soon.
Your Friend,
David DeAngelo